Friday, August 16, 2013

Rikshaw Troubles !!!!

Bhaya Langford road chaloge"
" Langford roadaa !!!!...illa ilaa" (Note : dialogues have to be read with a tinge of south accent. )
Chalo na bhaya .." pleading
"Vokey Rs 150 dena"
Rs 150 !!!!!!..arre bhaya 40 hi hota hai !!! "
Heheheh...40 Rs...!!!!  kyaaaaa Amma...toh hum naiii jana"....said he with a devlish smile..

Beginning of yet another beautiful day in Bangalore !!!!  Believe me I have nothing against Bangalore..I love so many things about the climate...and many other things that I can't think of right now..but yaa I Bangalore... ( Sob Sob...OKKK I admit I love Mumbaiiiii...and I miss it like I know why they say once a Mumbaikar always a Mumbaikar ) .

In Bangalore the autodrivers are terrorists in green uniform...and they drive me nutsssss...!!!...I mean come on..everyday they have yet another unrealistic demand..and on top of it they call me their amma...!!!!....Nahiiiiiiiii..!!!..I think people should actually go on a morcha against them just for that reason..Hmmphhh !!! Then one day after being called amma for the one millionth time , I decided bas enough is enough , these autowala's should be taught a lesson...and from that moment itself ..yours only Mumbaikar took the responsibilities of female Shahenshah...aka Shahehshi.. Please accept my Bow.. 

Andheri raaton meiiiiii
Sunsaan raahon per 
Har zulm mitane ek masiha nikalti hai ..
Jisse autowaale Shahenshi kehte hain...

Thankyou Thank you

 The responsibilities included :
1. Catching a suspect cheater autodriver
2. Negotiating properly with him..
3. If anybody quoting an unrealistic amount 
 Then < give karara jawaab and forward his auto no to the traffic authority >
 This worked so many times that suddenly there was fear amongst all the autowalas of Bangalore. A fear of Shahenshi traveling in your auto and complaining about you. Traffic police of bangalore were flooded with auto numbers. Radios , Tv going on and on about Shahenshi...phew !!! Suddenly things were perfect..just perfect until oneday.....


First of all some basic information Mom (M) , my mother-in-law ( MIL )and Myself wanted to travel from location X to our house. As per Shahenshi rules I negotiated properly ..

Me : "Bhaya Koramangala chalenge"

Autowala ( A): "Hmm 120 Rs"
Me: " 120 Rs !!!...nahi bhaya 75 hi lagta hai yahan se"
A: " Nai madam raat hai 120 vonlyyyyyyyyy !!!!!!  "
Before I could open my mouth...M and MIL in chorus

Koiiiii baat nahi beta denge..vaise bhi raat hai...isse less mei kya milega "
Me : "Arre yaar kya kar rahe bangalore inki aadat toh kuch bhi bolega.."
 Leave de"

Great !!! my crew members seemed like agents of the autogang...(God forbid if emotional atyaachaar people ever have to face such problems..)
M and MIL started their chit chat...

M : Chit
MIL : Chat..chit chit
M : chat chat...rat a tat
Suddenly I woke up...I looked around ...we were definitely somewhere else..

Me : " Bhayaa kidhar jaa rahe ho.. "
Autowala sleepily : " kworaamangalaa...(burp) "

Me: " Arre board mei toh Jayanagar dikha raha hai...."
Autowala silent

Me: " Turn maaro...abhi turn maaro...Take a right ..yahan se left lo...uss autowala se poocho...blah blah...and some more blah "

Atlast we reached home...phewwwwwww !!!..

Autodriver  : " Amma 200 dena "
Me : " 200 kyu..humne 120 bola tha na "
A (typical south accent ): " Tum ghoom ghoomke aana..itna petrol mera khana..isliye 200 "
Me : " Tumko humne Koramangala bola..tum kidhar bhi ghumaane le jaoge toh hum kya uske bhi paise denge?? " (Clap clap for me...thank u thank u )

Now our autodriver looked disapprovingly towards M and MIL..." Dekkko madam itna raat hai...abhi aisa bolte hain kya "

Suddenly I was Amrish puri and he was foreign returned son for my 2 Jaya bachans...kabhi khushi kabhi gham part 2 .

Now M and MIL strated talking in kashmiri: M1: " Ye chu gareeb bichor !!!...vayn kya chu di emis...kyuta zoov kadav emsund" ( Poor soul...he is very poor... its nothing..we cant suck his blood )

Me : " What ???... he is not a poor soul...plzzzz...I am not going to give anything extra to him..that too for taking us on a ride...Psst Psst ...mummmy mummy I wanted to tell you something..I am Shahenshi...remember that sansani episoe...its me autowala's are scared of me...I complain to the police whenever I find any autowala doing cheating... "

But to my disappointment ...they were much more interested in the sad story of the autowala...

Autodriver : "Amma itna raat ko gaadi chalaneko mera aankh bhi dukhta tha...per mei kuch bola??...nai na..aur abhi madam aisa daantke baat karta... aisa acha hai kya ??....mere ghar pe bhi aap dono jaisa maa hai..mujhe ghar jana khaana leke ..amma ke liye.."

I saw a small tear escape their eyes...suddenly they took out money from their purses..and said " koi nai koi lo beta paise jao.."
and turning to me.." Hatay bichor ... kya rovi...itpathan cha karaan..dumri dumri khatar chak paan maaraan..?? ".. ( Look at the poor boy...but whats wrong with you...for single single penny you have started to fight !!!! ")... aur  kya shahenshi behanchi laga rakha hai...khana toh theek se khaa nahi sakti...apni halat dekh... aur logon ka complaint karti rehti hai...tujhe jisne shahenshi banaya uska complaint karna chahiye... "

One tight slap on my face !!!!....Are eating and social activities related ??...Noooo !!!!...but for parents  somehow everything is related to eating , studying and what wonder Superman, Spiderman, apna Indian Krishh had a flourishing career...yeahhh coz they never ever told their parents about it.. else their superhero career would also go down  the drains..!!! ...Sob sob..!!!

P.s : This happened a couple of years if currently you are the Shahenshi or Shahensha...dont worry I dont know your was just that I didn't get time to write about it when I was in your shoes...please continue your good work and here's a pat on your back..I am proud of you my dear...:)...but still if you want to say anything to me...Please be my guest and leave a Comment here..:)

Thursday, May 19, 2011

Click ! Click !

Am finally back to my dearesssttttt blog spot...and it feels soooo good..seriously...for a person like me...who at every point in time whether in a bus or on a cycle, is busy making up stories and who at each point in life is ready to include the character of a "YET ANOTHER " stupid was actually very difficult to control myself and be away from blogspot ..but such is life. Actually the last time I announced my marriage on my blogspot..I got very emotional comments from some handsome and some not so handsome guys...half of them even took on to drugs after hearing my new marital status...for them I can only pray that guys don't lose hope you will surely find an average girl for yourself..(heheheh..coz the best is already taken...;))).....)..and plzzzzzzzzz say no to drugs..:D...

In this break had been to Mauritius...and what a place it is ... romantic.....Now in Mauritius S and I were very sure we would have a really good time and would try to enjoy each and every moment..I mean how many times do you actually get a week off from office..hai it was high time we left all our tensions at home. To make it more eventful we decided to enroll in for some adventure sports . So the first day we decided to go in for Paragliding... Arrangements were done and we were told by our agent that we would be joined by one more couple. Another couple...!!!!....insecure that I am..I immediately started instructing S to stay away from the girl..but I tell you boys will always be boys..he wore his gogs..styled his hair....thus raising my BP to an extreme level...

S : " Hey don't worry yaar I will not pay any special attention to her...but can't help it if she does " a wicked smile..
Angry me : "Hmmm... theek hai theek hai.."

Scene 2: Our vehicle stopped near a hotel...being a possessive wife and a jealous one too (like a true bhartiya naari )..I kept peeping through the car window to get a clear view of the couple who would be joining us....from a distance I saw two Indian Uncle's approaching our car...both of them in their 50's..very fat...wearing dehati goggles...
" Hmmm okkk.."..surprised me
" Heyyyyy what the heck...are they a couple???? "...disappointed S..;)

Uncle 1 and Uncle 2 sat with us, raised their gogs and gave a widddddddeee smile...
we returned a grin ...

Uncle 1 : " Ahhhh Indianss ??? "
S : " Yes.. "
Uncle 2 looking at both of us suspiciously..then suddenly winking at S and asking...
" Hmmmm.....Friends haaaaaaaaan????? "
Me trying to clarify : " No no no we are married..."
Uncle 2 : " Hahahah ok ok...good good "
S : " So where are you both from ??? "
Uncle 1 : " Jee we are from Chandigarh...we have come here for holidays.."
" Ohh good good "..we both sang in chorus.

The whole way they kept on talking and talking if they had a bloody motor inside their mouth. After 1 hr which in their company seemed like 10 whole days..we reached that place ..
Atlaaassst fresh air...and paragliding...boss it was a wonderful experience.. ( This is highly recommended to everyone....believe me you feel like a bird...wowwww...:) )

Now if you are married or have a Bf/Gf you would understand this universal truth.. that if you go out on a romantic holiday or an outing with your other end up having no pics clicked together as a couple.. In our case it is the same thing...our fb accounts are filled with my pics in different poses..some under a tree ..some on top of a tree and that too trees at different locations.. and poor S gets left with minimum pics...that too don't turn out that well ( I mean..come on.. everybody is not blessed with a photogenic face like mine nooooo....:P....sorry S....heyy but you are improving...:) )..and only one or two pics half the time we have to explain to everybody that baba we had gone to X place together onlyyyy....But this time S came up with an idea ...S being one hell of a fighter...had decided that this time he would have as many pics as mine...better than mine..and even couple that everybody would know who had spent the bucks on these trips...hmmm fair enough I thought..but how??
" Uncles kab kaam aayenge...!!!...we will ask these uncles to take our it is ..what will they do here... "..S suggested
It was a moment of pride for me..I always knew S was meant to do big things in life...
" Tum mahaan ho S..waah "...Sob sob..

So we jumped into action..we could see both Uncles...I went to one of the uncles..
" Aaaankeeel aankeel ( Plz pronounce it the way it friend used to call uncles as aaankeeeel...and all indian uncles used to find it soo sweet that all uncles..however rude they were would melt like butter and from rude uncle would turn into Santa clause clone aaankeeels...ho ho ho..)...aaankeeel aaankeel..will you please take our pic together.."...
and like I said...aankeel melted..

" Jarroorr jee jarooor...take a pose take a pose"
S and I flashed our smiles...hurriedly S combed his hair...confidently put his hand on my shoulder and we both gave a pose of Hum saath saath hain...

Uncle : " Wonderful jee...wonderful"...showing even with sign language of his fingers that what a wonderful pic that would be... " One more pic ho jaaye jee one more pic .."

Again we gave another pose...Uncle seemed so happy with our talent that he too decided not to be left behind..and started click click click...
After 2 -3 pics ...We took the camera from Uncle and hurriedly wanted to check what had been saved...
I still remember.. when we saw the pics...S and I looked at each other with a mixed was a complicated one..laughter ..trembling lips..confusion and shock...
The first pic didn't have our body only had our 2 smiling heads in the background of a wide open sky...and second pic had the photo of only one ear.. I still don't know whether it was S's ear or freaking somebody else's ear...!!!!..

Aaaaaankeeeeeeeellllll ye tumne theek nahi kiya...!!!!..tumne humara pyaar dekha hai gussa nahiiiiiiii....
.......arre how was it possible that somebody would not even know how to use a camera....arre if he didnt know..he should have told us na baba...wastage of time and pose..

But not for our 2 aankeels ...I think this gave them some idea..coz after sometime.. we could see them approaching all bikini clad girls and repeating the question to them :
" Madam Do u want us to take your photooograp???.."

And innocent that these foreigner kudi's are ..they very sweetly would handover their cameras to these uncles...they would take a photograph and do some timepass talks with them..
Now everything was ok..but imagine..the reaction of these foreigners when they would see the end result on their cameras...India's name totally ruined...stupid aaaankeeeels...

To cut a long story short ....Phewwww...whole Mauritius trip was excellent except for ofcourse the uncle part..and yes again we ended up having separate S's pics.. ( this time with little improvement).., my separate pics ( mind blowing as usual ) and the 2 smiling faces of our's dangling together...:D

P.S :
Do leave your comments to let me know if you liked my post or have any suggestions for me ....and for spammers please keep your dirty fingers out of my blog...

Monday, August 10, 2009

Jab We Met (Part 2) ..Gathering Troubles

" Hellooo !!!!"
Me : " Namaste Aunty !!! "
Looking very pretty...sooooo ..feeling nervous ?? "
Me after fake blushing : " Hehheheh....hmmm..ya a little nervous...and hows every one??"
Everyone is fine...heheheh....chalo all the best...byee"
Thanks Aunty"

Okkkk now who was she???....a new question..a new doubt..

If you are still thinking what exactly is going on in this post..then boyzzzz and was my marriage reception ...(
Sorry to break all handsome and not so handsome hearts )...well yes I got married and on my reception day I realised I had a memory power of Aamir Khan from Ghajini....
Those who are married and have undergone this experience will know what I am talking about..and those who still have not got should really undergo such tests..this will help you in analyzing yourself.. knowing your strong points..your intelligence.. whether you have an inbuilt acting and modeling talent or not ...and to know whether you have a photo genic face..or that of a scare crow..;P..

Receptions/Marriages are like reality shows...In front of the camera..nothing can go wrong..its all perfect..Bride HAS to look beautiful..Groom HAS to look like a prince..and a fairytale is captured by the camera man..with varied background music.. (such songs which you might have never even heard before)...but off camera..silly mistakes..goof up can happen..

Hey was she your aunt or mine??"
Pata nahi re....we will ask somebody else afterwards..keep shooting ho raha hai"..said S in full enthu
Lights camera smile from my pose from S's side..and there was no end to the imagination of the photographer...sometimes you are asked to give a serious pose of Amitabh Bachan and Jaya Bachan from Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Gam...sometimes a exra happy look from Hum Saath Saath Hain...but after giving so many get so frustrated tired..that you start looking like Sridevi from Nagin..;)....

Sir ...hello sir...aap seat pe betho ..and madam aap seat ke handle pe betho.."
Sir smile toh do..wo dekho madam ko...kaise hase jaa rahi hai.."
Believe me one photographer said exactlyyyy this to me..I was not even smiling da..I dont know why he said that..but I got sooo bloody conscious that I stopped smiling only)

Heyy..kya hai wo aunty ke plate mei...slurrpppp ...kya tasty lag raha hai"
" Arre humko nahi milega kya...??....humko khaana kab milega??Humara number kab aayega??"

Yup this was the worst part when I could see everybody enjoying other than the two of us...people having tasty tasty Tandoori chicken, Paneer pakode, Spring rolls ..yum yum ...was feeling like a roadside beggar watching rich kids have their food..."
Humko kuch kaane ko dede baii"..

But damn ..cant eat on stage...imagine all my pics coming with one plate in hand..Hmmm not a good sight..

On top of all this... when you see so many people together in the same hall, you keep forgetting their names.. their connection with you know them..when you met..etc etc blah blah..BUT you need to act...act as if he / she is the chosen one "for your marriage"..
But this acting has to be done under proper guidance..else things can go wrong..and YOU CAN BE CAUGHT MID WAY..
Namakaaarrr beta...kaise ho"..(In a typical Kashmiri accent)
Namaste uncle..mei theek hun..aur sab log kaise hain"
Waray waray...che parznovthas beh??" ( Everyone is fine..Btw did you recognize me?)
Heheheheh...(Damn no...)..haan uncle ..parznovum" ( Yeah recognized )
Acha kus chus beh?? "..( Ok so who am I..??)
Hehheeh ( God plzzzz help me..S say something..arre whose uncle is he??...)..hehehe...Priyanka didi's dad right ( who Prinyanka..which Priyanka..dont ask) "
Uncle with a surprised look..."
Hatay kusi Priyanka....beh chus Boytoth.."..[ What Priyanka ..which Priyanka...I am Boytoth..](For those who are not kashmiris..Boytoth is a is not like Boy is Boytoth...hmmm a different name ...pronounced in a different way..kashu people will know..what I am talking abt..;))

Ohhh acha acha..sorry thoda confuse ho gayi thee.."
Hatay confuse chak gasan..tohy bambi wayl chu sory keh mashraavaan..wal wayn..naal muth teh myooth karay..."..(Confused !!! from Bombay forget everything..come here will give you a hug..)
In kashimiris..hugging each and every relative is of utmost you can imagine our halat..when you have to standup every now and then and keep hugging people...its damn tiring..and you get programmed...Smile..Stand ...hug..sit (In a Recursive mode)

In the end when our stage "performance" was over..I gave a sigh of relief that now nothing could go wrong.We atlast went for having our long awaited dinner ..suddenly my mom came with 2 gentlemen
Everything went fine na !!"...asked my mom
oh yes.."
Oh btw did you meet them..they were saying Dimple Didi ko ab tak nahi mile.."
Since I was still in my recursive before hearing the whole story..I got ready to give my 2 brothers..who wanted to meet thr Dimple didi a robotic hug..when suddenly my mom said
Hay hay...Yem che waaaaz aamat"...( Heyyy...they are the cooks)

Phewww Thank God didnt do anything....this only meant that still anything could I said..Receptions are like reality shows...any thing can happen at anytime...I hope you people too are successful in keeping your silly mistakes...and popatness off camera..All the Best.. :)

( PS : All characters and names used in this post are fictitious in nature..and boss in case you find some similarity with your character or name......then be happy with the 2 min fame that you are getting because of me..and promise that you will write a post and make me the heroine in that ..:) )

Thursday, April 09, 2009

Jab We Met...

People who have met me know that I talk a lot..I got this habit since the time I was 2 yrs old..yup... from that time onwards.. I have been talking non stop...Sometimes on a topic and sometimes without anyyyy topic...Phewww!! But there are times when you can't do even things you are very good at..and same thing happened to me...
yes my dear happened " Jab we Met "...I mean when I met " S " for the first time...

My parents were worried about my not because I had any was because the astrologer broke out a secret that I AM A MANGALIK...yeahh..(not that there is any big deal about can refer to my discussion on it from my earlier post Duhh !! ..............). Now the point here is that the astro uncle was quite clear that kundli had to be matched properly ..and my damned kundli was not matching with anyone..not even with the tree ... hero of my Mangalik blog .
Then suddenly one day one kundli came ...PERFECT MATCH..!!!...(Touch wood Touchwood..
Adding to my touchwood touchwood...I will add a song too..Jammu truck driver special..

Buri nazar waale
Tu sao saal jeeye
Aur jab tak tu jiye
Tere bacche tera khoon peeye

waah waah waah waah

The boy was S...very qualified...MBA from a very reputed college..who had always stood Ist in his class...and where I was concerned...for me...I had always stood Ist in the queue while going back home from school..yes always....:)) !!!

15th Dec 07 was decided as the date when I would for the first time meet a guy for shaadi (Marriage ) talks..
That day ..believe me I was not at all tense..I was feeling parents were more tense than me...
" Vayn karze na badtameezi .."..( " Now dont misbehave over there") instructed my granny as if I was a ruffian kid going to meet my school principal..

" Don't worry granny dear, it will be fine...and mom plzzz...if I show signs of disinterest to you...plzz save me..just check out the status after maybe 20-30 mins...if he is boring me to death ..then do anything..use any excuse but plzz you will have to save me "
For me it was very simple...if the boy throws attitude and shows off his qualifications...I will show him my attitude..but in case the boy is good..then I would have to make him say yes for me..(Boss I cant get so many leaves from office..) so it had to be now or never ...

15 th Dec..I took a HALFDAY from office ..(see I didn't get a leave that day also ..and you are thinking why it had to be now or never)..

SCENE 1 :Mom and me waiting for them to turn up..
SCENE 2 : Entry of S, his mom and a common Aunty
SCENE 3: Both of us trying to know each other as much as we could...Now when we were talking with each thing was clear,he had done all types of R&D about me...hmmm..he was ek dum well prepared..where I was concerned it was a usual case for me ...attending exam without any preparation .
My eagle eye vision and Chacha Chaudhary wala tez dimaag se I could make out that he was a very good boy and very down to earth..I don't remember any instance when he tried to show off in front of me...that meant only one thing...Mission SAY YES had to be started:

That meant giving a biiiiiiiiig smile after regular intervals...showing off my 32 teeth...[Now coz I already look a little like Ashwarya Rai and hmmm ... a little like Kareena...then you can imagine the effect my smile would have on him..sorry I seriously don't like to point this out..but don't have any other modest..thanku thanku..( Ok...those who know the reality can continue with the next line)]...and would have to use a little bit of my acting talent..

As far as he was concerned he wanted to show how much effort he had put in knowing me... After every 5 mins he would shoot " Yet Another tricky " question at me...and I was not prepared with even one answer....I didn't know what to to ask..and what to answer..:P

" So what are your expectations from your husband"
"Hmmm expectations...oh yes ..many expectations..He has to be caring, sweet, I need security in he has to be well settled.."
" and and hmmmm nothing..."
Dratt I was not even able to cook any more expectations on spot
" Are you serious ???...these are the only expectations?? I mean other girls have a list of it"
Ooops !!! what I wish I could have a peep into these lists..may be I was forgetting something..I had to act confident ...had to do something...Ahhhhh !!! Acting Lesson no 2, dialogue no 242 would have to be used here ...
" Hmmm...other girls may have many expectations...BUT I... am a very simple girl....who does not have many expectations...coz expectation leads to unnecessary misery and suffering "

I saw him yawning like anything...ooopppsss ...I have always had this problem of overacting...dialogue no 242 had always been a failure..
S tried to change the topic after hearing this answer...I think he was shocked and didn't want a female version of Buddha ..

" What all things do you like"
" I like to sing , dance, talk,read novels.."
" and??"
" and...and many things... I .. I like everything.."
Why why does he include AND after hearing every answer...shucks...!!!

"I have are a big time kanjoos"
" Whatt kanjoos me???...who told u that.??."

" well got to know through my sources..and that too you never used to share your tiffin??"

NOT SHARING MY TIFFIN???!!!!! was then that I realized that he had seen my orkut profile also...and these friends of mine had not written any good thing about was all about my kanjoosi..).

" Heheheh...these friends of mine don't have any other work...they have written all wrong things about me..actually mei kanjoos nahi thee...wo log confuse ho gaye ..hehheeh...wo jhooth bol rahe hain...mei thodi si hi thee..ab mei theek hun.."

" hahahah..oh I can also ask should not be a one sided has to be more interactive"
" Yes sir..ohh i mean yes S "
Now I thought even I should ask I copied all his questions
" Now you tell me What do u like??"
" ehm ehm...this was my are asking my questions.."
" yaaaa..coz I am not prepared..thought of copying it from you"
" ok ..but only once..after this you have to ask your own questions.."
" Ohh sure.."..
I showed off my 32 beautiful teeth..and hypnotized him in such a way..that I copied all his questions..and he didnt point out even once..:D

" Come lets go out for a walk..." S said after sometime
" Oh sure..."....Heheheh now was my chance to earn some extra points I thought..

While having a walk we talked about so many things..(many secret talks that I will not tell you for free...)

" Hmm had a great time today with you..I will drop you home"...said S romantically
Yesssss mission was proving to be successful... Thanku thanku
" Yeah same here...but need to go to my uncles place now..everyone is waiting there"
" No probs..I will drop you there..."
BLUSH BLUSH..." hmmm ok..if you insist.." ..I spoke like a new sharmili bride..
We walked and talked...we talked and walked...while talking and walking I got so engrossed..that after sometime I just didnt know which road to take...We had suddenly reached a place ..which I had never seemed like a mini how to tell him..what would he think about me...Mannnnn !!!! I got so pissed off ...I had no clue what to do...
" Hey do you by any chance know where we are??" I asked him
" No why are you asking me..I dont even stay in Mumbai"
" Ohh good..coz even I dont know..but dont worry...let me just call up and find my uncles address"
"ok"...surprisingly he seemed cool about it...
On the other hand my parents were mad at me.." Kya goyyy kya asay sochaaan"(Wts the matter wid wt will he think)..
" Psst Mom please dont scold me..plz tell me the address..I m lost"..I whispered
Atlast I got the address ..I gave S a biiiiig smile..." Got the address... now we will leave"
" Ok.."...
ok !!!!again just ok..may be he was having some after thoughts..may be I was going to get rejected..I looked at him nervously...he seemed was then that I realized... he was still in hypnotized state...phewwww...good for me !!!..that meant he would never remember half the things..
We took a rick and went directly to my uncles place ..where all my cousins were hanging from the window grill just to have a glimpse..introduced him to everyone and bade him bye..

Hmmmm that day if you see we were together for more than 6 hrs...In the end it was a YES from my side...(Clap..clap for me...)..and my SAY YES mission was successful...he also said yes...:)..( Yeahhhh thanku thanku.... another round of applause ).

P.S :In case you need tips on SAY YES...or hypnotizing lessons ( BEWARE: It is effective only till courtship period...not after marriage..;)..)..or may be some acting lessons ( With free over acting tips) ..u can always approach me...:)

Tuesday, September 02, 2008

Frustrated Mind

What happens when 2 frustrated minds meet each other?? Result -------> This blog

Holiday is usually a treat for lazy girls like me, but this Sunday.. I was feeling soooo restless...When I say usually means..talking a lot..jumping from one place to another...beating up people..or day dreaming about things like magic carpet,ring or anything that can make me feel different or one up from others. During my childhood days I wanted to have a invisible that I could go to the place where the exam papers were being corrected or that I could either give my self full marks..or leak out the papers from there...:)
And not to forget my magic ring.. to find whether the classmate whom I liked, had any hidden feelings for me in return ..:P

That Sunday as I was all alone at my place..with nobody to talk scraps on orkut to check..and nobody to beat or do masti dreaming was the only TP thing that I could do successfully.
Entry of my cousin..

Me :" Tell me one thing are a Engineer right?"

He looked at me suspiciously : " Yup...but hold on..I am a Electronic I cannot repair any software fault in your see that is out of portion..we are not taught that yaar"

" Oh I see...what are you taught in college"
" Sis we are taught..anything and everything that is not useful in practical world..;) ..that is a harsh reality...Phewwww...sob sob"

" Heheheh.....ok I was going to ask you something else..yaar being a Engineer...tell me one thing..can you make something for me...that can be useful for me"

" As in ??"

" As in... something yaar..something different....may be a wing or something "

" Wing???..which wing....wing for this building??....naah that comes under civil Engineering"

" No stupid...wing ..human that one can fly"

" Fly?????..Where do you want to fly?"

Me : " I mean just think yaar...removable wings..When I have to go to office..I will go to the terrace ..slowly see if nobody is watching me... will attach those wings..and start flying...go to on the terrace....remove the wings..keep it in my bag...then everybody will say..'Hey when did you come??..didn't see you coming !!! '...and then I will have this hidden smile on my got it..?? "

He was looking at me with if I had committed a sin in front of if I was a psycho or something..
Cousin to me..clearing his throat: " Ehm...Ehm..Oh...I see..... "

Now I was quite embarrassed...'coz these are thoughts ..thoughts that usually you do not speak in public. I mean we all ( I think so)..get these thoughts..but we keep them in mind..we never speak them aloud . I was sure he was a bit worried now about me...and was ready to hear his comment about ..' DIMPLE GO AND SEE A DOC'

I said " Yes...go on"
" No I was just thinking often get these thoughts kya??"
" Ya..I mean...just like that yaar..for passing my time..."..I said defending myself..before he would suggest any doctors name.

" Ok..but then don't you think something is wrong in this"
" Wrong?? "..I gulped down a big saliva..and nearly choked myself..

He gave me a very serious look.." Ya I mean suppose you have got wings to fly...then there is a danger of Eagles and other big birds yaar..what if they damage my Human wing..It can be very dangerous..." Suddenly his tone turned accusing.." What if you fall down..and people see you??...Madam..nothing will happen to you because of the automatic parachute. But all intelligence agencies will come to know about this great invention..and about the brains behind this successful creation...I can be in yaar I will not give it to you...too risky...I will think of some other plan.."..saying this he left my room..

Aaiiiinnn????!!!!! ...ok"

Blank look on my face....followed by a biiiiiiiiiiiiig smile...I am not dearest cousin by my we both fly and conquer the world..:)

Tuesday, July 01, 2008

Atlaaaast I am 24 !!!!....:)))

Yup turned 24 ..and am sooooooo happy ...Just think about it...24 yrs of my life are over and many more still to come...woahhh gr8888888....:)))..Cheers to that..:))

Though nothing much has changed in my life..I still miss the way I used to celebrate my dress to school.. chocolates for friends and teachers...cutting cakes, waffers , gulab jamun...yum yum. I used to personally go to each friend's place and invite them for my evening Birthday party and would janbujke include this line " Gifts Not allowed haan plzzzz"...which would be like a reminder to foolish friends that there exists a tradition of giving gifts...and which also meant that plzzzzz buy me a beautiful gift...I would wait eagerly for my evening party..mainly accepting gifts from everyone...once that was done..waiting fo every1 to go that I could see what was lying inside...actually while accepting the gift itself I would get a hint of what could be there no not because i was a gifted child and no also not because i had X-ray in my was 'coz usually it would have Pencil Box, tiffin box..and sweet frnds wud buy biiiig games..(oh yes..and I would never forget to call those SWEET friends for my next bthday..)..

Ohhh btw everyone is invited for my birthday party and Plllzzzz Gifts not allowed..;P

Sunday, June 01, 2008

Mujhe Kuch Kehna Hai- Part 2

Hmmm I know you will ask why Mujhe kuch kehna hai PART-2 ..when PART-1 was never written..Welll!!!!! part 1 was a Kareena Kapoor movie...and this title was suggested by one of my here goes MUJHE KUCH KEHNA HAI PART-2...
WARNING: Read it only if you are a fast reader or if you have ample amount of time
PLEAD: Plzzzzzzzz read it even if u do not belong to those two type..:P

It was a lovely September morning .Abhi was in the company bus on his way to work and as usual trying to catch up with sleep. A girl gets on the bus, comes to his seat "Good Morning!!!" . Abhi looks back at her through half closed eyes, replies "Good Night " and then proceeds to return to his half hour nap . Unfortunately, he is woken up by a punch in the arm.."Wake up, bozo!" She looks at him with a big smile on her face. "I'm not sitting next to you to listen to you snore."….Half-heartedly, Abhi opens his eyes and turns to her "What's up?"

Preeti was good-looking and slightly tomboyish. She was also his best buddy. "Come on" she says "Don't look so disappointed. You'd rather sleep than talk to me???"
" But I talk to you everyday, Preeti."
"But you also sleep everyday."
"It's not enough."
"So… you've had enough of talking to me, eh?"
You can never argue with a statement like that, so he gives up..smiles and says, "OK, sweetheart. What's on your mind?"
"I wanted to tell you what happened yesterday. Can you guess?"
"Hmmm lemme see..Anurag called you last night."
"Ohh my ghosh did you know?"
"Oh, he asked me for your number yesterday."
"And you gave it to him?"
"What else could I do? And stop complaining. You've been drooling over him for weeks now. He must have thought he had a chance."
"You like putting me in these situations, don't you?" she says.
"No…. That's not true. I love putting you in these situations!"
That invites another punch in the arm.

Abhi and Preeti had known each other for a year now. They did tell each other about their joys and sorrows,victories and defeats. Abhi would tell her about all his crushes and she'd scold him for being silly. She'd drag him to classical music concerts and he would add them to the list of things she 'owed him' for.

It was 12:00 am and his phone was ringing. "Hello"
"Happy Birthday!" It was she.
"You're supposed to throw me a surprise party, sweetheart. Not just call to say Happy Birthday."
"Well then open your door, dumbo!"
So he does and finds her, cell-phone in hand, at his doorstep -- with what seems like half the population of his company. His roommates were supposed to be working late that night. Now he knew why...:)
That day he blew a lot of candles (seemed like much more than 25), cut his cake, gets painted with the cake's icing. If Preeti had had her way, she'd probably have preferred to use a paintbrush and a can of paint.
That day they chat for an hour after everyone has left.
"I think it's time I left," she said finally, trying to stifle a yawn. Abhi drops her home. As she is getting out of the car
"Hey, Preeti."
"Hey, don't get senti on me now!" she smiles and leaves..
Abhi sits there for some time, just thinking. Their conversations were
always like this - a little joking, a little teasing ..
But somehow, something had changed since the moment she had turned up at his door that night...It was special..very special ..and he wanted to do something special for her..he knew Preeti loved reading books..So finally he buys half-a-dozen omnibus collections of various authors.Slowly he starts spending a lot of time at her place .
“Hey let me take this novel home”
"I'm not as stupid as you, ape-man. I know you will lose them. Plus, you dog-ear your books. You're not doing that to these masterpieces. So if you want to read them, you read them here. And if you want to mark your place, use a bookmark."
"Need I remind you that it was me that bought you the books in the first place? "
"So? They're mine now."
"Well, then. I've been meaning to ask you this for a long time. Where exactly is my birthday gift?"
"It was in your tummy at one point of time. It's probably been washed into the sea by now."
"Remember the cake I baked you on your birthday?"
"You what? You can't bake cakes!" That was a mistake. She looked hurt.
"You baked me a cake????" ..She didn't say a word. She just shrugged.
Abhi was stunned. "But you never told me."
"You didn't ask." That was typical of her.
"It was fantastic! And you wasted most of the icing on me!"
"The cake was for you, dumbo."
"How long did it take you to make the whole thing?"
"Well, the chocolate cake took an hour and fifteen minutes, and so did the vanilla. Then cutting them up and putting them together took another 15 minutes. Each flavor of icing took 20 minutes for preparation. On oven it took another half and hour.. Cleaning up the mess took an hour."
She seldom claimed the credit for anything, but once she started
bragging, there was no stopping her. However, Abhi wasn't thinking about that right then.
"You spent over five hours on that cake?"
"I forgot to mention," she continued, "the hours I spent the week before that, practicing… Even the birds wouldn't touch the first three cakes!"
He couldn't help but ask. "Why?"
"Because the first one got burnt, the second one was only half cooked ,and in the third one, I forgot to add sugar."
It was just like her, to try to divert the conversation.
"I mean why did you spend so much time on baking me a cake?"
She looked at me like I'd asked her why the sun rises in the east.
"For your birthday, stupid. Of course, I also wanted to beat every gift you've ever got me. Try beating this one." She was grinning like she'd won the world championship.
As far as he was concerned, she had. He'd never spent a week making her anything. Getting her a gift normally involved taking her to the store, letting her choose and use his credit card. Suddenly, he felt cheap. "Thanks.." was the only thing he could say. "Thanks a lot..."
"Hey. Are you getting senti on me again?"
And this time he was…

He was still mulling over his feelings for Preeti the next day at work when his boss tells him that the company wants to send him to New York for a couple of years. Normally, this wouldn't have made much of a difference ..but right then, the first thought that comes to his mind is that he'd be away from Preeti for two whole years. He had had crushes before…lots of them…but this was different.
"Do you have any problem in going?" boss asks
"Not really..When do I have to leave?"
He had a month.

"Wow! New York ! Great! I've heard it's a fantastic city! "
Preeti was obviously very excited about his going. She didn't seem to share any disappointment on what he now saw as 'separation'.
They had known each other for a little over a year, and were very close, but beyond some mild flirting, the relationship had never got even close to romantic. That was, of course, until he found out she had spent a week baking a cake for him. It's funny how small things seem to make such a big difference.
"What happened?" she asks. "You don't seem very happy."
"'s just that it's so sudden, that's all. And you know I was never all that interested in going to America ."
"What an idiot. Go see the place. I've heard the women there are
amazingly beautiful." She had a sly smile on her face. He wanted to tell her, he didn't care if he laid his eyes on another woman again, if she wasn't with him... But he didn't.
He realized that he only had another month with her. She'd rejected every guy who'd asked her out ever since he had known her. He didn't want the same to happen with him, and he didn't want to make it awkward between them. He didn't want to risk that month. He wanted it to be the best time he had ever spent with her.
They ate out almost every night. She'd call him up almost everyday to tell him to add 'one more item' in his list.
And with every passing day, he was falling more deeply in love with her.

The month swept by quickly. The day Abhi was supposed to leave, he asks her to come with him to the airport. They reach the airport four hours early to beat the rush. He finishes the formalities and comes to sit with her.
"Hey, Champ. Why so glum?" asks Preeti
"I don't want to go,"
"I don't want you to go either."
"No, you don't understand." He could not hold it in any longer. "I can't
stand the thought of living without you by my side."
She stares at him.

"I love you a lot yaar..."

At this, a sound escapes her lips that sounds like a cross between a
sob and a laugh. "Well, dumbo, you've picked an absolutely fabulous time to tell me about it!"
A tear escapes her eyes.
"How long have you felt this way?" …she was crying and smiling at the same time..he didn't know what to make of it.
"From the day I found out you had baked me a cake."
She laughs. "That's all it took? Well, bozo, I guess a way to a man's heart is certainly through his stomach! Hold it. A month? You waited a month? You were the one who kept saying that if you really liked a girl you wouldn't waste a day in telling her!" ..She was smiling widely now…it looked funny, with her eyes all wet.
"Well, I was confused. How did I know.. how you'd react? In fact, I
still don't understand your reaction. I thought it would change things between us. You've rejected every guy who ever proposed to you!"
"That's because even I'm in love with you, you overgrown idiot!"
"What?" …Somehow, He had never expected her to say that. She was in love with him?
"How long have you been in love with me?"
"Ever since the day you offered to carry my suitcase for me."
"But that was the first day I met you!"
"I guess I was always a sucker for chivalry."
"All this time you've been in love with me and you never said anything! Then you go and complain that I waited a month!"
"You guys are so bad at reading a girl's mind."
"You women are so good at keeping your thoughts a secret! Even Einstein couldn't figure you out."
"Einstein was a nerd."
"Hahahhah…but seriously…I really don't want to go." He had always maintained that love was a bucketful of emotions. He wasn't exactly delighted to be proved right.
"Don't worry. I'm coming there in a couple of months."
She laughed. " Welllll…!!!!....I've got a project in New Jersey ."
" What? When did that happen? You never even told me!"
"Well, I wasn't sure you'd propose before you left. And I couldn't
exactly sacrifice you to those New York women, could I? I had to watch out for myself. So I went on a project-hunting spree. There is an opportunity coming up for a project in about two months. Someone is coming back to India , so I'll be taking his place. They want me there for a little less than two years." She was beaming. "I realized I had struck gold!"
”But How come you didn't lay a trap for me a year ago?"
"I tried giving you hints, dumbo, but you just wouldn't pay attention!" She was laughing. " You're the only guy I ever spent any time with…Wasn't that a big enough hint?"
"Oooops…yeah….ok…What if I had rejected you?" extremely flattered that she'd been crazy about him for a year...his ego swelling..
"Rejected me…You must be kidding!" she was clearly amused. "I get proposed to every few days. You are the one who's been rejected more times in the last year than I can count on two pairs of hands!"
She really knew how to burst his bubble.
"Hey," she said softly, "don't look so dejected. I said 'Yes', didn't
"Yes, you did. And you've made me a very happy man. But you know what would make me even happier?"
"If you learn to cook as good as you bake cakes."
A punch in the arm again…
Happy Ending…:)